When Therapy Becomes Spiritual Growth for HSPs

My goal as a therapist for Highly Sensitive People is to help my clients make the fastest progress possible—without skipping the essential steps that lead to deep, lasting change. This week, I had the privilege of sitting with a long-term client whose journey beautifully illustrates the power of sustained inner work. She has given me permission to share her story in hopes that it may inspire others.

The themes we explored were:

1. Two different paradigms of therapy. One generates suffering, the other invites peace and freedom.
2. Hearing the voice of God

The Turning Point: From “Fixing Myself” to “Growing Myself”

BE: You’ve been in therapy for two years now. I remember when, after the first year, you felt ready to stop. But you continued, and now you are scheduling private sessions every two weeks and you joined the 7-month Highly Sensitive Person group. What changed for you?
K: I realized there are two very different paradigms of personal growth.
When I started therapy, I was in the first paradigm. My attitude was, “I’m not happy, I need help. When will I get this done so I can live my life and be happy?” I saw healing as a finish line to cross—like once I got there, I could finally start living.
Now, I see things differently. I’m in the second paradigm: “I want to keep growing, even though I feel okay.” I’m deeply grateful for how far I’ve come, and I want to continue expanding.

Building Real Closeness

K: There’s been so much growth in my relationships with my parents and my sister. The more I live as my Authentic Self, the closer I feel to them. I’ve learned that I don’t need to abandon myself in order to stay connected. My inner child still longs for a kind of closeness with them that she doesn’t always get—but now I know how to nurture and comfort my inner child.
I’ve learned to play with my inner child, to listen, and to soothe her when she feels sad or insecure. That’s helped me experience a new kind of closeness—one that’s deep, mature, and freeing. I may always have tender feelings, but now I can hold them with compassion.
In essence, I’m developing a secure attachment inside myself—with my inner family—and that allows me to deepen connection with my outer family.
BE: Beautifully said. All relationships, inner and outer, are ongoing processes. They grow stronger through time, consistency, and love.

Learning to Hold Emotions Instead of Fearing Them

K: I used to believe that if I could just get “there,” I’d be okay—that if I healed enough, the bad feelings would never come back. Now, I understand that I don’t have to get rid of my feelings to be okay. I can handle them.
BE: You’ve done such powerful work these past two years. I’m very proud of you.
K: I’m grateful you pushed me when I needed it. You practiced tough love sometimes—firm but kind. You encouraged me to keep going when I wanted to stop. But you also knew when to let me rest. That balance helped me grow.
Today, I feel good about myself, my life, and the people in it. I’m in a new, peaceful place—but I don’t want to stay here forever.

A New Motivation for Growth

BE: Tell me more about why you don’t want to stay where you are now.
K: Now that I see what I couldn’t see before, I know there’s more refinement possible. I want to keep learning, but without the urgency or panic I used to feel.
I’m no longer driven by anxiety or depression. Instead, I want a steady rhythm that allows integration and rest. I want to be a better communicator, a better listener, and to grow in alignment with my purpose.
Before, I focused on finding a career or calling before I truly knew my Wise Self or felt connected to God. I was good at many things—but not fully aligned. Now, I ask, “What is God’s will for me?”

Listening for God’s Voice

BE: Let’s pause here. Go slow. Reflect. Listen to what God is saying to you right now.
K: That’s what I’m practicing. I realize I’ve had certain expectations for how I’ll know when it’s God’s voice—like I should hear it clearly in words or see an image. But I’m learning that the Holy Spirit may lead me in different ways.
Part of me still wants certainty, but I remind myself: God can communicate however He wishes. My role is to stay open, patient, and receptive.

A Beautiful Confirmation

The next day, my client sent me this email:
“Last night, my beloved priest—whom I haven’t seen in many years—pulled me aside at a dinner. He said he’d had a recurring dream where we sang together at an event. The song was ‘The Prayer’ by Celine Dion and Andrea Bocelli. I asked jokingly, ‘Were we any good?’ He said, ‘Yes, we were very good.’ My mind is blown, and my heart is full. God is so good.”
Moments like these remind us that when we open our hearts, grace finds its way in. Healing isn’t just about fixing what’s broken—it’s about awakening to the beauty, mystery, and love that have been with us all along.

Closing Reflection

The shift my client experienced—from wanting to get done with therapy to wanting to keep growing—marks a profound transformation. When healing becomes less about reaching a finish line and more about living in alignment with your Authentic Self and God’s guidance, you begin to experience peace that isn’t dependent on circumstances.
Growth becomes a way of life.

What’s your next step of growth?

If this story resonates with you—if you long for deep emotional healing, authentic connection, and a stronger relationship with your Wise Self and God—I invite you to begin or continue your journey of transformation.
You don’t have to walk this path alone. Reach out to schedule a counseling session or inquire about upcoming HSP groups or retreats for Highly Sensitive People. Together, we can create a life rooted in authenticity, love, and peace.

Contact Information

Benita A. Esposito, M.A.  is a spiritual counselor, life coach, licensed professional counselor, and ordained minister. Please complete the Contact form to get in touch.

Benita’s bestselling book, The Gifted Highly Sensitive Introvert, can be found on Amazon. She spots psychological patterns to reach the bottom line so you don’t waste precious time. She follows a grace-filled Christian path that honors all faiths. For fun, she grows beautiful flower gardens. She loves to hike through forests to waterfalls. Her inner shutterbug shot most of the photos on this website.