The Downside of Advice-giving: Motivational Interviewing Part I


If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. 

If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime.” – unknown


When our loved ones experience problems, its only natural that we want to help resolve their troubles. Empathic sensitive people are smart and weve learned a lot. We want to help. One of our natural tendencies is to give people advice and tell them what to do. Therapists, parents, friends, supervisors, and teachers fall prey to this tendency. Read more

12 Ways to Love a Highly Sensitive Person Well

If you have the opportunity to fall in love with a highly sensitive person (HSP), you are blessed beyond measure … and … there are a few challenges you’ll need to learn how to manage. Read more

Three Blind Spots in Dating for the Highly Sensitive Introvert

If you have dated for a while, you’ve probably fallen head-over-heels in love at least once, and then you discovered that your partner wasn’t exactly who you thought he or she was. Maybe you were in a relationship for a few weeks or a few months. Maybe you had sex and you felt a certain level of commitment. You wanted to be loyal and you were not a quitter. Maybe you had moved in together. It wasn’t easy to end the unhealthy relationship.  Read more

Conscious Dating Inner Circle for Highly Sensitive Introverts


20 Benefits of the Conscious Dating Inner Circle

1. Discover scientific research that tells us WHY healthy relationships are so important.
2. Create an ideal relationship vision based on your core values, your north star.
3. Spot the unconscious reasons why you ignore the red flags that get you into trouble.
4. Heal your inner child wounds that unconsciously perpetuate unhealthy patterns.
5. Identify the fears and beliefs that prevent you from creating your ideal relationship.
6. If you want to upgrade your outer world, you must first upgrade your inner world.
7. Discover how your outer relationships reflect the relationship you have with yourself.
8. Learn about your attachment style and the styles that you typically attract.
9. Explore how your family of origin experiences affect your adult relationships.
10. Be your own best friend. Stop losing yourself in a relationship.
11. Develop spiritual intimacy to shore up your secure foundation.
12. Compare obsession, relationship addiction, and codependence with healthy love.
13. Maintain healthy boundaries and develop mastery with conflict management tools.
14. Stay grounded during conflicts by regulating your emotions and nervous system.
15. Enhance your self-awareness with mindfulness, self-acceptance, and self-compassion.
16. Learn inner dialogue skills to resolve internal conflicts between parts of self.
17. Discuss sexuality … your values, your desires, what is wise and what is not.
18. Become aware of when one foot is on the gas and when one foot is on the brake, and if that is helpful or not.
19. Discover why you hesitate to communicate assertively, and how to advocate for yourself tactfully.
20. Enjoy having an accountability study buddy so you can increase mastery with new skills..

Want a sneak peak for the Conscious Dating Inner Circle for Sensitive Introverts?.

Click here to fill out the Contact Form. Ask me to email the introductory webinar recording. 

Meet other like-hearted Sensitive Introverts in the Conscious Dating Inner Circle. Participants will combine their knowledge and work together on exercises. You will create your Ideal Relationship Vision, identify Core Values, and highlight Roadblocks that could prevent success.

“As my negative emotions calmed down, my heart opened up more. I began to feel more loving toward others. All of these changes were unexpected, very soothing, and delightful. Benita is warm and caring, yet also warm and direct, and she knows many techniques that help with personal healing and empowerment.” – P.L., Writer, Seattle

Logistics for the Conscious Dating Inner Circle.

WHEN: 10 Mondays, 8:00-9:00pm Eastern. Inquire about the dates for the next Inner Circle. Fill out the contact form.

There is a minimum of four people in this small intimate group.
If there are 6 or more people, the time will be 7:30-9:00pm Eastern.

WHERE: Zoom video-conference from the comfort of your home.

TUITION: $557.00

Payment Plan: The tuition will be $587 when paid in two monthly payments of $293.50.

Payment is due upon commitment to the group via Venmo. You will receive instructions after your Discovery Call if you are a new client.


This is an intermediate level group. New clients need an intake session with me, Benita Esposito. Most participants have had counseling with me or with another therapist or with a spiritual director. Or, they have participated in intensive personal growth retreats or training programs..

Apply for the Conscious Dating Inner Circle for Highly Sensitive Introverts.

If you are a current client, tell me that you want to enroll. Go ahead and make your Venmo payment to

If you are not a current client, please complete the Contact Page and mention your interest in the Conscious Dating Inner Circle. Fill out the application. After you return it, we’ll schedule a Discovery Call, and then have an intake session if you want to join the Inner Circle.


I’m so excited to share my free Conscious Dating eBook!

You’re gonna love this 20-page eBook. It’s full of vibrant color photos and educational materials to accelerate your ability to create your ideal relationship.

“Where would I be today without our work together? Not where I am. If only you could meet the man I have drawn to me. My husband takes my breath away with his exquisiteness. Never could I have been with such a man in such a way without all of my past and all of the work we did, you and I.” – P.B., RN

Here are a few excerpts from the Conscious Dating for Sensitive Introverts eBook.

You’ll learn the pitfalls of dating. Learn to spot the red flags and understand WHY you might have ignored them in the past. I don’t want you to repeat mistakes.

Narcissistic manipulation and abuse kills a relationship, but so does boredom according to research by Arthur and Elaine Aron. If your core needs for emotional intimacy don’t get met, you will get bored.

Sensitive Introverts tend to be too “other-centered.” We often give and give and give and don’t get our needs met enough. We’re so empathetic we can be taken advantage of. We need to focus on ourselves more. This is not selfish. It’s important to show up fully as your Authentic Self in your relationship, ask for your needs to be met, and care about your partner. I’ll help you stop losing yourself in a relationship.

Sensitive Introverts are idealistic visionaries. We often see the potential of who people can become. Sometimes we fall in love with the “potential” rather than the person. Take off your rose-colored glasses. Teach yourself to look accurately at the truth. That’s rigorous work, and you’ll probably need help doing it. I’ll help you save years of suffering.

Click to read the free eBook: “Conscious Dating eBook” by Benita Esposito

Stop wasting time.

“Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, and know when to run.” 

– Kenny Rogers


FACILITATOR: Benita A. Esposito, MA. Chief Trail Guide on your Hero’s Journey to the Authentic Self.

I’m a life coach, a spiritual counselor and an ordained minister with AIWP. I earned a master’s degree in clinical psychology, and my bachelor’s degree is in psychology/sociology. I combine Christian spiritual healing and psychological principles. I follow a grace-filled Christian path that honors all faiths that advocate loving God and each other. I coach adults (individuals and couples) in private sessions and in intensive retreats.

Your Authentic Life. Anything Else is a Compromise.

Four Tips to Sensitively Say ‘No’ to Children. Part 2 of 2


Parenting is one of the most important jobs on the planet. Attachment theory research reveals that when parents attune to their children well, kids grow up with a secure attachment style. They are more likely to choose nurturing romantic partners, be emotionally and physically healthier and more successful. Read more

Four Tips to Sensitively Say ‘No’ to Children. Part 1 of 2

I’d like to share a special experience that occurred in our weekly Highly Sensitive Person Resilience Group.  This particular story is about hurtful ways that our group members were  parented, and their desire to be better parents to their children. Read more

Healing from an Abusive Marriage: Devon’s Story

Self-Care Learned the Hard Way

Devon, a highly sensitive man, called me for counseling at the prompting of his mother who was concerned about him. His dearest friends told him that he no longer seemed like himself. He was depressed. He was not eating properly, he had severe insomnia and he had trouble focusing on his work. Normally, Devon was an exemplary worker. Read more

Happy Valentine’s Day!

If you have a romantic relationship, I pray blessings over your bond that it may blossom in joy and vitality.

If you don’t have a romantic relationship, I pray blessings over the loving relationship with yourself. It’s impossible to have a healthy relationship without this. Read more

Podcast 5 Tips for Healthy Relationships

Do you have a relationship that you would like to improve? Most of us do.

How’s the quality of your romance? The relationship with your parents? Your children? Your co-workers? Your friends? Read more

Attachment Styles and Highly Sensitive People. What predicts healthy romance?

This is chapter 8 of my bestselling book, The Gifted Highly Sensitive Introvert: Wisdom for Emotional Healing and Expressing Your Radiant Authentic Self. Available on Amazon. Search for “Benita Esposito.”

Let’s look at the research on attachment styles to help us understand how to create healthy romantic relationships. Read more